Table for One
Now that I live in a huge city with pubs only a few meters away, instant food/drink are a constant temptation. Mix that with a husband who travels for work and being new to a city, my appearance at pubs alone has increased by 100% (it’s harder to do this in Britain with the lack of table service). So I have bravely been mitigating the solitary drinking scene with virgin eyes and experience. I’m sure I’ve put a foot wrong so far as I definitely don’t know the etiquette on where to hang my jacket.
I am now striding confidently into a pub and exclaiming, “Just me” with an embarrassment that makes both the waitress and myself uncomfortable. I then sit down, previously with pen and paper, notebooks, and cell phone littering the table. Hopefully pronouncing to those around me that I am an important executive visiting the city on work and not a failed, friendless semi-alcoholic. Now I have been trying out the watching TV method, while checking my nearly dead phone for anyone to text me back.
Games on TV give me somewhere to look, though it seems that no one ever puts on the hockey, with the local pubs only providing America football and basketball. I watch pretending to be interested and subtly order beer and wings. Because now that I’m not out with the girls, I can leave the gin and tonic with a side salad for other less solitary outings.
I drink my beer and eat my wings, allowing for a much more critical take on what I’m currently putting in my mouth…I suppose also like a virgin. I actually enjoy (or hate) my drink more than when I’m with a bunch of people distracted by pleasant conversation and talking too much. I swear the best glass of wine I ever had was in a pub, alone, near Whitehall in London. It was red and tasted of independence and victory.
The food, because I’m generally eating wings, can be as messy as I’d like and I can eat fast (there’s no cause for politeness here) with only slugs of good drink to temper me. Weirdly though I’ve never had as good a meal as I’ve had when other people are around. Maybe this is a self-conscious thing or maybe I only frequent bad food establishments (it’s mostly for the wings).
It’s all going well and good until ultimately I need to…powder my nose. Because all those pints do tend to make a nose quite…shiny. So what to do? I could just get the check, use the bathroom, go home or somewhere else. This is generally my go to because the alternative is a bit…awkward. Asking the table next to you to watch your things gets a bit complicated. I’m not going to leave my purse (I do need to check that I actually brought my wallet) but that leaves my drink and jacket.
If I ask the person next to me to watch my jacket, that is lame. If I ask the person to watch my drink, then that implies that I think someone will put something in it. Which makes everyone feel uncomfortable. If I ask them to watch the table, it makes it seem like I’m sure they’ll give my table away at the briefest occasion that I’m not secured to it. ‘The lone woman is gone, we can give the table to that large group over there’. My husband explains this isn’t just a girl issue. Try sneaking out to the bathroom from a pub at the airport, that whole ‘unattended baggage’ is apparently some sort of ‘danger sign’.
The thing is, I actually like eating and drinking alone sometimes. It’s great for people watching/character copying, I can watch a sport I like with other people who also like it and it’s a liberating feeling. Woman a hundred years ago would never be able to do such a thing. Many women twenty years ago still wouldn’t do it. And although I generally never sit at the bar (then you have to talk and I’m not sure I’m ready for that), it’s not like I’m alone. I just need a little more practice. I see old men doing it all the time, so could be it takes a lot of practice.
And once I sort out this bathroom thing, I can entirely stop making my own meals (albeit with the downside of potential heart and liver disease). Sometimes being at a pub alone with a bunch of strangers, beats being at home alone with Netflix.
Netflix will definitely not watch your drink
Originally Posted - Jan 4, 2015
